R-E-L-A-X


There's this one tall guy in my building who lives a few floors above me. Whenever I see him in the elevator he seems annoyed, mashing the 'close door' button and sighing loud enough for me to hear over my headphones. The other day I got in the elevator and he went through his normal welcoming routine. Then the elevator stopped again on the next floor to pick up someone else, and he shook his head and muttered "bullshit," so now I know that I wasn't imagining his annoyance with the elevator. If there's anything in the world more futile to get angry about, it's how many times the elevator stops on the way to the ground floor. It's out of your control, and at least you're not walking down all those flights of stairs. Next time I see him in the elevator I'm planning on hitting the button for every floor on our ride down, so I hope he doesn't turn out to be even more insane than I think and stab me.

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